Speak Your Truth about Body Image Issues

This story was written by an 8th grade girl who battled with the terrible body image issues in our culture:

At first, it helped. I called it my friend, one who served me and never left my side. It got me what I wanted - a small piece of control in my out-of-control life and what I believed was a “better” body. At first, I didn’t think it was a disorder. It was just a “healthier” lifestyle. I still felt okay, mostly. I was still myself and it was just going to help me lose a few pounds. I could stop it when I was satisfied with myself.

After a few months, it began destroying me. I had lost way more than a few pounds yet it wouldn’t leave me alone. Seeing the numbers on the scale go down made it proud, but also made it want more. It constantly told me that I was still too fat; it was never satisfied with me. I always felt hungry, but it wouldn’t let me eat. Not unless I burned off the calories in the gym. It had so many rules for me and I obeyed them all because it told me it was helping. It became exhausting and it took away so many parts of my life. I lost most of my energy, my motivation, my joy. I grew easily irritated all the time. I lost my physical health and well-being. I always felt cold, covered in four or more layers. Standing up made my head spin and ache with dizziness. Some of you may have noticed these things about me. Still, it kept me going, telling me that I was fine. I couldn’t ask for help, that meant giving up.

The “it” she writes about was her anorexia, an eating disorder which brought her through a terrifying journey. She thought that looking “good” meant looking like models on social media and that this was the way to feel happy and in control of her life. She took it so seriously that she starved herself, and had to be hospitalized to recover. Luckily she got the medical care to heal her body, and support to heal psychologically and realize that she had believed an untrue, unhealthy story from our culture. 


This is not only a challenge for girls. Young men struggle with body image too. It may seem like you need to have huge muscles or look like a superhero in order to be a “real man” like the heroes in media. This can be just as damaging, stopping you from feeling good in your own real body.

Until we realize that these stories about how our bodies “should” be are not true, we’ll keep feeling bad and keep forcing our bodies to be something that isn't real or healthy. When you realize that many of the images of beautiful people online or in magazines are actually edited by software, or shot with special lighting and cameras, you might start to realize that you are being manipulated by these images. You’ve been sold a story. It’s just not true that your body has to be a certain way for you to be loved.

If you think you are over-weight or under-weight, your doctor is the one with a real answer. Comparing yourself with these fake images online will just lead to unhappiness. It’s time to reveal our culture’s story about body image, and to make a better one.

Getting Started: There are many ways to begin raising your awareness about this and making a better story. Here are a few possible ways to get started: 

1.     Get Educated: There are excellent books and websites available for this, to help you understand what these issues are like and how to get through them. Check out Teen Talk, NEDA on Instagram, or for girls, About Face.

2.     Catch a Comparison: Comparison mode is when you’re constantly comparing yourself to others or to an image, and deciding how you should feel based on that. Unfortunately, comparison mode is one of the quickest ways to be unhappy. So the next time you look at an image or another person’s body and think “I wish I looked like that” or “he looks more ___ than me”, see if you can catch yourself in the act. You might think to yourself “that’s my brain in comparison mode” and then try to focus your attention on something else, or even to thank your body for all the ways it helps you, like letting you be alive in this moment, or letting you use your senses to experience the world.

3.     Compliment Yourself: It’s easy to say negative things about your own body without thinking about it, especially if you compare yourself to photoshopped images. Try giving yourself a compliment instead. The more you notice the strength and beauty of your body, the happier you’ll be in it.

4.     Talk About It: As you start to realize all the false body stories in our culture, you have the chance to speak this truth out so that others can understand, and to help yourself too. You could write about body image issues in a school newspaper or a blog, or create a public-service style announcement for others to be aware of body image disorders, letting fellow students know how common they are, and how serious they are, with the highest mortality rate of any teenage disorder. You could find examples of well-known people who have publicly rejected this story of how their body should be, who choose to post on social media when they look less than perfect, or who speak out about being “photoshopped” and how images of them aren’t real. 

5.     Offer Support: If a friend or family member is saying negative things about their body, speak up. Let them know that you love them and they’re just right as they are. If they think they are are under-weight or over-weight, that’s a question for their doctor. If you hear them comparing themselves to models online, you can lovingly remind them they don’t have to do that, that those images are often fake or photoshopped, and that real people in real bodies don’t look like that.

6.     Get Support: If you suspect that you might have an eating disorder, tell a trusted adult about it and speak to a doctor for help. Eating disorders can be really dangerous—like the story says above, you may think you’re controlling it, but soon it starts controlling you. Don’t keep it to yourself. Everyone needs help sometimes.